The Book Of Brilliant Things - Tue Dec 27

Album Of The Year
The album I’ve listened to most – probably twice as much as any other! – is Laura Marling’s astonishingly good second album from last year: “I Speak Because I Can”. But my own self-imposed rules mean that can’t be it*, so it’s gonna have to be “Amanda Palmer Down Under”! Yeah, I know, quelle surprise etc etc.

Book Of The Year
See the footnote to above (displayed below*) for more comment on why I mysteriously don’t insist on my Book Of The Year having come out in 2011. But for those interested, it’s the reasonably recent “The Wire Re-up: The Guardian Guide to the Greatest TV Show Ever Made” (edited by Steve Busfield and Paul Owen) (2009) which Martin bought me – a total compendium of middle-class message-board enthusings about those currazy Baltimore characters transferred to hard copy. Sheeeeit.

Disappointment Of The Year
Not winning a single penny on the Lottery for the Monkey Kettle Syndicate. I thought it was supposed to be easy to win our millions? The Impossible Dream gets further and further away.

Event Of The Year
Ludamus turned 20. I don’t know if many people really appreciate the multi-faceted achievement which that vast span represents, and how much work from so many souls has gone into it over the years. But I do, and it has. I don’t want to live in a world without time-travelling pirates.

Film Of The Year
“Monsters” – released in UK cinemas December 2010 and still on release at the start of the year, not that I saw it in cinemas. But I did see it twice on DVD, and am quite a lot in love with it. Sci-fi so lo-fi it’s almost no-fi.

Foodstuff Of The Year
Beef Fillet with Glazed Shin and Crispy Ox Tongue. Yes. I am now a gourmand.

Gig Of The Year
I’m gonna go with The Criminal Minds at MADCAP in the Autumn. It wasn’t just the relief that we’d finally got an audience at a “Dudebox Chronicles” gig, it was the feel-good vibe of a long-long-overdue return by all-conquering heroes to a hometown audience that had missed them. And the fact I therefore got to see them for the first time, aged 36 and a half.

Hero Of The Year
I’ve discovered him late, but then lateness is all relative given the beauty of physics. It’s the Mark Owen of TV science, Professor Brian Cox. Bless him. Watching him is like watching Johnny Ball again, but for grown-ups!

Moment Of The Year
The biblical hailstorm, mid-set during the Disciples of Gonzo at the Waterside. The elements cannot stop the rock. We all know now not to let the winter in. Even in the summer.

Place Of The Year
Atop Greenwich Hill, at the Meridian line. Gazing out across the vast metropolis.

Play Of The Year
“Art”: Sh*t Happens. It was another good year for Theatre in MK, with Pepper’s Ghost as intriguing as ever, Ludamus reaching a milestone as described above, and Milton Keynes Theatre of Comedy continuing their excellent run of classic TV sitcom adaptations (with a “Return To Fawlty Towers” and “Blackadder The Third” to mention but the ones I saw). But although they may not be permanently based in MK, I enjoyed “Art” (featuring two of our most-loved ex-Ludamites) so much it’s them this year for me. Contemporary, fresh, well-located and funny.

Single Of The Year
I’m seriously questioning whether this category still has any relevance. Sure, bands do still release singles, but in a world where I listen to almost everything on random shuffle or via YouTube, almost everything is a ‘single’. Or maybe I just haven’t had a chance to listen to that many singles this year. I’m not a big downloader so I certainly haven’t bought any for years now. Do CD singles still even exist? Weirdly, the track I’m choosing – my favourite new song by any artist by a long way BTW! – wasn't officially a single, but does have a video. Gor bless Amanda Fucking Palmer – “In My Mind” describes exactly where my soul is at in 2011 so much better than I could myself.

TV Show Of The Year
You can’t really fault TV’s best new channel – Sky Atlantic – for the majority of their scheduling over the year, and I’ve had a hard time whittling my three favourites down to a winner. In the end though I think “Game Of Thrones” was enjoyably preposterous but the pace felt too hectic, and while David Simon’s “Treme” is an intriguing watch, it’s no “Wire”. So I’m going for “Boardwalk Empire”, seasons 1 and 2 of which have been on this year. An interesting angle to ye olde gangsters & intrigue plots, and stands the test of great TV drama for me in that I often find myself suddenly musing on the nuances of one or other of the various characters while supposedly going about my own business. And it’s got Steve Buscemi! (doffs hat)

Villain Of The Year
I didn’t think there would ever be a worse West Ham manager than the hapless Glenn Roeder, but Uncle Avram Grant managed it. Charisma-free and seemingly tactic-free, I find myself horrifically able to believe the fan site rumours that he was discovered by the coaching staff asleep at his desk at one point last season! Certainly he seemed to snooze his way right the way through to our meekest ever capitulation to relegation. And I’ve witnessed a few.

Website Of The Year
Amazon.co.uk. Yes. I am a directly contributing factor to the decline of the high street music shop. (looks sad)

* strangely these self-imposed rules apply STRICTLY for Albums & Tracks, REASONABLY STRICTLY for Films, and NOT STRICTLY AT ALL for Books. I wonder why. I suppose it’s rare that I buy a NEW Book in any calendar year.